Mental Health | A Happy Lass

Realist, cynic, sensible, unindealistic…are you one of those people who considers yourself rational and grounded? I’m flippin’ tired of people trying to make these qualities sound good! Of course, there are times when rationality can solve problems and levelheaded people are great in crisis situations. I pride myself in my ability to show these qualities when necessary. HOWEVER, too often people use those terms as a cover up for their pessimism.

Anger and pessimism are something that I have been trying to cut out of my life for some time now. I decided, around the time I graduated college, unchecked anger would fester inside of me; not only ruining my day but affecting my relationships with loved ones.

Getting the anger out was surprisingly easy. I am very self-aware and it was just a process of recognizing when anger was brewing and quickly repeating to myself, “it’s not worth the energy, it’s not worth the energy…” and taking deep breaths. It works! Anger is no longer a factor in my life and it’s wonderfully freeing. Of course I still get the random bought of uncontrollable fury but at that point I remove myself from the situation until I’ve calmed down.

The part I’ve really be struggling with is learning how to STOP COMPLAINING. Did you ever have a person in your life that complains, a lot. Not that they know it or would even be able to change it but boy is it a downer. I’ve had lots of people like that in my life and can’t help recognizing that I was one too. Yep. Me, a complainer. So this is my next step in personal growth. Learning how to cut out the “realism” and pessimism and just learn how to appreciate anything and everything.

My current personal growth activity: say or think a bad thing – say out loud 3-5 great things about the same subject.

example: Man this rainy weather sucks…but…it means I get to snuggle down with a cup of tea without remorse, and that my car is getting a rinse, and that the horrible drought this summer is finally ending!

See, it’s not so hard and it’s starting to make a world of difference. So try it, I dare you. It’s a real way to flip your brain to the happy side.

Yesterday was a rough day for me. I am trying SO hard not to complain and to look at everything in a positive way but jeez louise it’s getting difficult. I am very healthy, have a wonderful boyfriend, and loving family and friends all over the world. I write this awesome blog with awesome readers like you and I get to help people become happier and healthier all day. But something’s missing.

Maybe this is the problem with a lot of post-grads but I just expected my life to be slightly easier after I went through 6 years of 80 hour weeks in college. My social life was pretty great but I had no time to enjoy my friends. Now I’m finally making money (not much but it’s something) and am only working 50 hour weeks. But I don’t have any friends! Poor Mike bears the brunt of my breakdowns but they’re coming more and more often lately and it’s getting harder to turn my mood around. I would never trade my time with him for anything but WOMEN NEED WOMEN. And every attempt I’ve made to make plans with the ladies here has resulted in a great party/dinner/event but then never a word from them afterwords. Pretty discouraging and I’m just not sure what else to try.

Yesterday was rough. I had evening work to do but I said F that shiz and I cooked instead! I turned on my “singing” playlist and drowned myself in the music and the methodical process of cooking a meal. Ratatouille was the dish, taken from this awesome blogger. I never even knew what Ratatouille was so it wasn’t the best meal I’ve ever made but I’ll try it again and it will be even better.

The point is that I am finally starting to learn what calms me and brings me into the present. Having anxiety (check out this post) is a constant struggle against your own thoughts. It’s not an easy battle to win, but I’m trying. I fail a lot but I also succeed sometimes. My hope is that the successes will soon outweigh the failures and I can live my life in a more balanced way.

^ When I figure out how to make this better I will post my recipe.

So this morning I woke up and determined that it would be a better day. I’m starting off by writing to you (another one of my calmers) and now I’m about to work out and eat a nice, slow breakfast.

I hope you’re all having wonderful days. And if you’re not, figure out how to recenter yourself.