Tag Archives: Kids

Gossip Ruins People

Gossip

If you don’t have something nice to say, just zip that trap. We all heard that line (or some variation of it) when we were little. Every one of us has been the subject of gossip at some point in their lives. You know how much it hurts. So here’s the big questions:

WHY DO WE STILL DO IT?

I laid awake for much of the night wondering that. Just before I fell asleep, I found out that there are people who I barely know, in this brand new town of mine, gossiping about me. Rash, hurtful words that pinned me at my most vulnerable point.

Gossip Law #1: Even for me, strong, capable, confident me, words DO hurt. I learned this long ago in middle school and, ever since, I’ve realized that I don’t want to cause that pain to anyone else. It doesn’t matter how much I criticize them internally, everyone has weaknesses just like me, and I never want to make someone feel that that’s all I see.

Gossip Law #2: As much as we whisper and make people promise not to tell, the words ALWAYS get back to the person. This most recent gossip about me started in September. September! I heard it two night ago from a well-intentioned friend that was trying to help me become a better person. He was trying to help me and the fact that people talked STILL hurt.

Gossip Law #3: It doesn’t stop when we turn 16 years old, or 20, or even 35. It never just stops. It’s natural for people to talk negatively about others. It makes them feel powerful, like they have an advantage on you. Like they’re better than you. It’s natural, but it sucks and it can be stopped.

Gossip Law #4: It comes in all forms. Gossip doesn’t just have to be a woman whispering trash into another woman’s ear. As I’ve tried to cut it out of my life, I realize that gossip is any negative statement that emerges from your mouth about another person. Anything that, when you really think about it, could potentially hurt that person.

LISTEN UP. This is the most important one . . .

Gossip Law #5: It CAN be stopped. The only way to stop gossip is by filtering your own words. I have a best friend. My heterosexual life partner. She is the only person that I turn off the filter with. She does the same with me. We gossip to each other until kingdom come. But that is because we KNOW that it will never leave that conversation. With everyone else, my negative words are on lockdown. I don’t participate in negative conversations and will even try to stop them if they become about someone I love.

Everyone can do this. It only took me a few months to recognize and learn. So just try it, please. For the sake of all those people who you have yet to hurt.

Now off with you, have a wonderful, gossip-free weekend! I will be in Vegas with my family and friends through Monday so blogs will start back up on Tuesday. I will miss you all until then. But just remember:

KEEP CONVERSATION POSITIVE 🙂

 

Tuesday Recipe: Halloween Treats?

Halloween can be a daunting time for us “healthy ones.” Luckily I don’t have to worry about taking kids trick-or-treating this year but a lot of our patients and a lot of my readers do so here’s a quick guide to help limit the sugar in your kids’ systems:

Set an example by handing out “healthy candy.” However, DO NOT be the house on the block that gives out carrots or raisins. Some ideas for treats most kids love:

^Popcorn Balls – you do have to cook for this one but it’s really easy and they’re delicious.

^ Fruit strips – made of dried fruit and a replacement for fruit roll ups, they can be bought at pretty much any grocery store.

^Cocomels – from JJ Sweets, they are healthy and yummy. A bit expensive maybe to give to all the kids but a great idea for your own or even for Christmas gifts.

^ String cheese – what kid doesn’t love string cheese.

^ Natural Gummies – Surf Sweets sells a great version of natural gummy treats in the shape of spiders! But any natural gummi treat will do. I know this was one of my favorites when I scored on these as a kid.

^ Trail Mix – make your own with your choice of almonds, raisins, dried cranberries, walnuts, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, etc. Be sure to throw some chocolate in there (dark is best) so the kids don’t feel like they’re totally deprived!

^Crispy Rice Treats – click the link to find a great recipe from a fellow blogger. However, I highly encourage you to use healthy marshmallows with less sugar and cereal without any kind of ingredient with -ose on the end (ie. fructose, sucrose, etc).

Note: If you’re making the treats yourself, include a note to the kids parent’s of the ingredients so they don’t think it’s spiked.

Now, it’s inevitable that your kids get your hands on a fair amount of candy this time of year but how do you keep them from riding that sugar high for 12 weeks afterwards? I do not have kids so I really have NO IDEA, but I do have a couple of suggestions!

1. Give them a vacation night. Let them eat the candy. Let them work themselves into a sugar-induced coma. But while they’re there, ask them how they are feeling. Make them realize that the candy is making them sluggish, over-full, and cranky with a headache. Don’t harp on them, but for 5 minutes just try to help them realize the effect of the candy.

2. After their coma, give them incentives to “trade” the candy. For every 10 pieces, they don’t have to do their chore for the day. Something like that.

3. Ask them if they’d rather spend some time with you, cooking something else delicious that won’t make them feel like crap. Then proceed to make an awesome, fun desert (like the popcorn balls or crispy rice treats listed above) to make them feel that this is so much better.

Ok those are a few suggestions from a child-less 24 year-old. I hope they help a little bit! And I hope you all have an awesome Halloween!

What will you and/or your kids be dressing up as?